as you can probably tell i desperately need a place of escape and most of the time this was the woods and there are lots of them in my home state. in fact MAINE is just about all woods. there are probably trees growing there which are old growth, parts of a primal forest which dates back hundreds of years which still have not seen a white man only aboriginals . these trees were my refuge when i was a child. i hid in the woods every day when i was a kid to hide myself from the bullies who chased me down on the way home from school to beat me up. so i spent a majority of my time there. so i needed a place of refuge. this is what lured me into the trap of homosexual rape. in our church there was a man who lived with one of the families who attended there. he was a mental handicap and was molesting the young man who lived there. that young man who was at least 4 years my senior was sexually mature as he had an enormous penis and pubic hair and not realizing what was going on in that household i was invited to stay the night. this is when he began to molest me. i was a 10 year old kid and was so naive. the young man talked me into "giving it to his back sides" telling me that this was normal because all young boys needed practice so that when they were older and ready to be with a girl they would know how to "do" it. this was the lie he told me. and he presented himself as somewhat of an expert in the ways of sexuality. of course  i could seek his advice on the matter of sex at anytime so he told me as if he was really my friend. as a kid it was pleasurable to do this as it stimulated my testosterone levels and gave me quite a charge. then it got switched around this time it was he who was thrusting himself into my backside with his large penis and this hurt. all the while being lied to that this thing was okay. because of the abuse i was taking at home and the lack of love and affection i would spend the night there as often as i could. i am definitely not gay. never have been , never will be. i was just a naive little boy who was deceived by the young man who turned out to be gay (i call it queer and i do not care if this is politically correct or not). my need for a place where i was not beaten and mentally abused over- rode the sick feeling i had inside. for one thing  a young boy has absolutely no business having his genitals stimulated at such a young age. this pumps testosterone into his little system and it turns into a dangerous drug! because it need to be self administered over and over again (in some cases daily). most cannot help it and they end up resorting to masturbation which amounts to a situation which is similar to scratching a hive. a hive which you know is an itchy spot on the skin comes from histamine which is produced due to some allergen irritating the body. so the body swells up in spots which itches badly. this invites the person to scratch it. the trap is that it only increases the intensity of the itching sensation which causes more scratching! and the only remedy for it is to simply to leave it alone and suffer the itch until it finally goes away.male and female masturbation causes the production of testosterone in the body which increases sexual desire so that at a normal age and in the right circumstances men will engage in sexual intercourse and in the course of it they will reproduce themselves. under the guidelines set forth by our creator, this sex is to be engaged by 2 married persons of opposite sexual genders. this is GOD'S way and anything else is evil. take an innocent kid and begin to stimulate his sexual hormones and eventually this will drive him to a number of undesired out comes. these outcomes range from frequent masturbation to fornication (unlawful sexual activity), even raping and murder!!! it all begins because a child gets his system charged with testosterone which damages his psychology. to add to this danger some young boys get their system charged with estrogen. this happens as a result of having their nipples stimulated. the stimulation of the nipples in a man does the same thing it does in a women it produces estrogen in the body and makes the boy effeminate and turns him into a girl! although he has no vagina he will seek to find other gay men to treat him as if he was a women. often he will pretend he is a girl and will fantasize that he is a girl and not a boy. the next thing you know he wants to dress as a girl and act as a girl. the nipples are linked to whatever glands which produce estrogen this estrogen promotes femininity in the person even a male. in young girls this is the stimulation of the clitoris. and this is the female counterpart of the male penis. this also produces testosterone in the female body and if it is done often enough the girl turns into a boy with a vagina. she will want to dress and act like a boy. the mental and the psychology becomes confused so much that we hear the statement i was born as a female in a mans body or a male in a womens body. this is the lie SATAN tells them to deceive them. when it is obvious that the person is male and not a women at all or likewise the girl that she is a boy but without the requisite body parts this is why masturbation should be frowned upon and never to be engaged it ever with only one exception the person is sexually mature and married to a member of the opposite sex and they do this thing with EACH OTHER ONLY!!!    SATAN THE DEVIL sets up these programs in order to confuse and destroy the human family. and he does a pretty good job of it. what is required is complete sexual purity and a parent to fully explain to children why this must be so. kids are not dumb and all kids have a basic desire to want to do right......friends and readers this is why the media is pushing the gay agenda on you. SATAN wants to destroy the human family. he wants all people to go down into perdition (self annihilation!) and this was his plan right from the get go and obviously his reason and purpose is to eliminate the final outpouring of the word which will be his downfall. he is very tricky and employs many devices to reach his goal. to completely and utterly destroy all human beings from planet earth.